Journal Like Crazi/ #MentalHealthDay

I'm sorry it's been a while but hay! This is a long one!!!!! And also sorry for it being a little late! :)

Hi everyone!! :)

So this post is going for both my new YouTube Channel Journal Like Crazi as well as Mental Health Day because why not! But first I want to talk about why I decided to start my new channel tonight.

Journal Like Crazi: I have been making journaling videos for a while on my main channel which at first I thought I wanted everything in one place so that it's easier to manage for me. But tonight I decided to start this channel. And I was actually going to film and upload a journal with me video but decided to wait until I got this channel going. I decided to start this because I wanted a place were people can come and relax and be freed for a while. Journaling is something that, in the past year has been really important for me to do. It helps me to be freed in a way. And it's the one place where no one judges you. And it's also really helped with my anxiety as well. Journaling just in general helps me to get through a lot. I have both my Tom Riddle Diary that is my actual diary and my travelers notebook. I keep my diary at home and I carry my notebook around with me and take it with me to butte when I have classes. And it helps so much to have a place that I can vent my feelings, especially since i'm alone most of the time at school. And I guess that can Segway into #MentalHealthDay.

#MentalHealthDay: So I've never done anything like this before so I am sorry now for it being a bit all over the place I guess. So I have struggled with anxiety for my most my life. It was way worse in high school because I have stage fright that has gotten better but, back then it was really BAD! I always made things worse in my head which got me more scared to do any of the presentations in front of the class. It was worse in my guitar class because I actually had to sing along with pretty much every song and most of them were solo. My anxiety made it hard and scary to even sit in between both of my best friends in my guitar class and half of the time, my anxiety turned into panic attacks that not even my friends talking to me to help me try and calm down worked. But I am glad to say that with the help of my family and friends I was able to get through high school even though I couldn't do most of the performances or presentations because I always had panic attacks and break downs. They don't happen as much anymore, only when I think of going to a church activity and meeting new people does it happen. Because i'm not the best when it comes to those situations and half of the time I end up having a break down five minutes before i'm supposed to go or before I message a friend for a ride and I end up not going and hating myself. Just because your anxiety keeps you from going to activities or from doing the things you love, doesn't mean you should hate and disown yourself. I've done that. It's not fun. And anxiety can also put you in a really bad mental state like the one I've been in for a while, but, don't let it stop you from being you. And make sure you surround yourself with good friends and family and or just make a good support group for yourself. And if you don't have anyone. I believe in you! I know what it's like to let your anxiety get in the way of you living your day to day life. It can make want to stay in bed and do nothing. But don't let it do that. Talk to someone you trust first and start with that. For me talking to my mom and opening up to her about my situation allowed me to feel in control of my situation for once. And journaling came after that. If you don't know what to write, just scribble all over that darn page or two or three pages. I did that the other day and it felt good. If I take baby steps to get to a better state of mind, and to get better in general so can you. I'm sorry for this being so long, didn't know I had this much to say haha!! :)